The Best Way To Clean Up A

Don't Commit Suicide, Because You Might Change Your Mind Two Weeks Later.

War For Most Men Is Not Fighting Or Marching In Parades. It Is Sitting Around Somewhere Wondering What The Hell You Are Supposed To Be Doing.

This Is A Wonderful Way To Celebrate An 80th Birthday... I Wanted To Be 65 Again, But They Wouldn't Let Me - Homeland Security.

The Best Way To Clean Up A Son's Room Is To Close The Door And Pretend It's Not Part Of The House.

People Ask What I Am Really Trying To Do With Humor. The Answer Is, "i'm Getting Even