What's The Two Things They Tell You

When I Was A Kid, I Really Loved Indians. Native Americans. Pardon. Me.

I'm A Joke Comic. I Tell Jokes.

A Joke Is A Joke, And People Put Too Much Meaning Behind It. They React To It In The Wrong Way. I Mean, You Can Boo Or Laugh, And That's Pretty Much What You're Supposed To Do With Jokes. You're Not Supposed To Take It Any Further Than That.

Why Do They Collect Garbarge At 5am? Why? It's Garbage. It's Not Going To Go Bad Again.

Sometimes You Need A Cigarette. Like After You Have Sex With A Beautiful Woman Or A Confused Young Man.