Until We Look From The Bottom Up

The Hardest Thing On Earth Is Choosing What Matters.

Still Everyone, Including The Abbot, Had Said That He Was Running Away From His Grief. They'd Had No Idea What They Were Talking About. He'd Cradled His Grief, Almost To The Point Of Loving It. For So Long He Refused To Give It Up, Because Leaving It Behind Was Like Leaving Her.

Back In The Autumn I Had Awakened To A Growing Darkness And Cacophony, As If Something In The Depths Were Crying Out. A Whole Chorus Of Voices. Orphaned Voices. They Seemed To Speak For All The Unlived Parts Of Me, And They Came With A Force And Dazzle That I Couldn't Contain. They Seemed To Explode The Boundaries Of My Existence. I Know Now That They Were The Clamor Of A New Self Struggling To Be Born.

Madonna Kolbenschlag Suggest That If An Awakened Woman Forgoes Innocence And Denial, If She Refuses To Make Compromises With Herself And Defect To Patriarchy, Then Her Only Option Becomes Deviance. I Chose Deviance. I Chose To Be A Loving Dissident. To Dance The Dance Of Dissidence. This Stance Can Be Assumed From The Inside Or The Outside. Whichever Place We Choose, The Important Thing Is Having The Sustained Will To Be, Act, And Speak From The Ground Of Our Feminine Souls.

The Redness Had Seeped From The Day And Night Was Arranging Herself Around Us. Cooling Things Down, Staining And Dyeing The Evening Purple And Blue Black.