Two Things Do Me In: One's Chocolate

I Want To Say That Nobody Accuses Their Parents Of Abusing Them Without Justification To Do That. I Didn't Just Make It Up. A Lot Of Things Were True And Abusive And Horrible Things That Happened To Me That My Father Did.

A Guy Is A Lump Like A Doughnut. So, First You Gotta Get Rid Of All The Stuff His Mom Did To Him. And Then You Gotta Get Rid Of All That Macho Crap That They Pick Up From Beer Commercials. And Then There's My Personal Favorite, The Male Ego.

There Is No Scarier Chasm Of Darkness Than The Human Mind.

In Order To Be Able To Write A Good Joke, You Have To Find The Truth.

You Know When You First Get Rich, And You, Like, Just Buy Everything That You See? I Did That For Several Years. And I Have Sheds Full Of Things, Maybe Sometimes Nine Copies Of The Same Thing.