The Fact That My Grown Kids Like

My Real Life Is Funnier Than Anything On Tv.

You May Marry The Man Of Your Dreams, Ladies, But Fourteen Years Later You're Married To A Couch That Burps.

Once You Get Away From Wanting To Get Paid, You Can Actually Say Some True Things.

My Children Love Me. I'm Like The Mother They Never Had.

My Parents ... Had Decided Early On That All Of The Problems In My Family Had Somehow To Do With Me. All Roads Led To Roseyville, A Messy, Chaotic Town Where, As Parents, They Were Required To Visit, But Could Never Get Out Of Quick Enough Or Find A Decent Parking Place.