That Woman Was Sexy. . . .

On Furnishing One's Home - Pick Your Furniture Like You Pick A Wife; It Should Make You Feel Comfortable And Look Nice, But Not So Nice That If Someone Walks Past It They Want To Steal It.

Los Angeles Is Like San Diego's Older, Uglier Sister That Has Herpes.

When It's Asshole-tightening Time, That's When You See What People Are Made Of. Or At Least What Their Asshole Is Made Of.

The Baby Will Talk When He Talks, Relax. It Ain't Like He Knows The Cure For Cancer And Just Ain't Spitting It Out.

I Almost Feel Like I'm Unoffendable Now. I Can Roll With Whatever.