Nobody Is Going To Be As Bad

It's Not That I Don't Have Kids For Some Personal Reason Outside Of, I Just Haven't Had Kids. And I Haven't Met Someone Who Wanted To, As Far As I Know. And Perhaps I'm Attracted To Women Who Aren't Ready To Make That Commitment Just Yet.

[if Donald Trump Does Get Elected, I Will Be] Probably Secretary Of Reeducation. Or I Don't Know. I'll Probably End Up Working In The Cafeteria.

As Far As Just My Stand-up Is Concerned, I Don't Care About Changing Anyone's Mind. I'm Not Making An Argument. I'm A Guy Doing Comedy.

I've Gotten "condescending" A Million Times, And That's Not Good.

I Was Heavily Influenced By Andy Kaufman And Steven Wright.