My Husband Is Almost As Heavy As

This Bugs Me The Worst. That's When The Husband Thinks That The Wife Knows Where Everything Is, Huh? Like They Think The Uterus Is A Tracking Device. He Comes In: "hey, Roseanne! Roseanne! Do We Have Any Cheetos Left?" Like He Can't Go Over And Lift Up The Sofa Cushion Himself.

Excuse The Mess But We Live Here.

I Have A Fierce Eating Disorder That Has Survived Even Bariatric Surgery. I Got Even Fatter After That! Hey, Maybe Fat People Are Just Trying To Get Closer To Others, Did Anybody Ever That Of That?!

They've Said 'roseanne's Nuts' For Years, And Now I'm Going To Make That A Reality - I'm All About Nuts Now, Macadamia Nuts!

I Thank God For Creating Gay Men. Because If It Wasn't For Them, Us Fat Women Would Have No One To Dance With.