My Favorite Health Club Is The International

It's Amazing What I Could've Written In My Life If I Had Realized That I Should Keep Writing And Not Masturbating.

There's A Whole Group Of Christians Who Believe The Individual Is More Important, But In The End I Don't Think That's What Christ Was Talking About.

Nyquil Comes In Two Colors, Red And Green, And It's The Only Thing On The Planet That Tastes Like Red And Green.

Since There Are So Many Idiots Out There, You May Actually Start To Think You're Crazy. You Are Not. They Are Idiots.

I Think Comics In New York Are Interested In Being Comics. And There're Comics In L.a. Who Are Touring Comics, Who Are Certainly More Interested In Stand-up, But A Lot Of L.a. Stand-ups Are Really Looking To Do Something Else.