It Is Not Until You Become A

When They Told Me I Needed A Mastectomy, I Thought Of The Thousands Of Luncheons And Dinners I Had Attended Where They Slapped A Name Tag On My Left Bosom. I Always Smiled And Said, 'now, What Shall We Name The Other One?' That Would No Longer Be A Problem.

Do I Have To Use My Own Money?

I Didn't Fear Old Age. I Was Just Becoming Increasingly Aware Of The Fact That The Only People Who Said Old Age Was Beautiful Were Usually Twenty-three Years Old.

It Is Ludicrous To Read The Microwave Direction On The Boxes Of Food You Buy, As Each One Will Have A Disclaimer: This Will Vary With Your Microwave. Loosely Translated, This Means, You're On Your Own, Bernice.

Thanks To My Mother, Not A Single Cardboard Box Has Found Its Way Back Into Society. We Receive Gifts In Boxes From Stores That Went Out Of Business Twenty Years Ago.