I'm A War Of Head Versus Heart,

Because Of My Age And What I Do For A Living And The Amount Of Time That I've Spent Away From My Family And Loved Ones, I'm Starting To Relate More To The Late-period Kerouac Stuff In The Way That I Once Related To The Fun And Excitement Of The Early Material. There's A Darkness Inside Of Me That I'm Only Now Starting To Come To Grips With And Accept. And It's Starting To Scare Me.

The Late '90s Were A Really Bad Time For People Trying To Be Rock Stars, You Know What I Mean? It Seemed Like Everyone Was A One-hit Wonder On The Radio. We Had Friends Who Had A Hit Single On The Radio And Sold 500,000 Records, And Then They Couldn't Get Arrested A Year Later. I Had This Feeling At The Time That That Was Not Possible Anymore, So The Idea Of Becoming The Biggest Band In The Country—it Seemed Laughable. I Felt That Having Those Sort Of Ambitions Was Foolish, Because There Was No Way That Was Going To Be Possible. If You Saw It That Way, You Were Just Deluding Yourself.

You Spend Hours Alone, Only With Your Thoughts, And You Torture Yourself. It's A Tendency Of Many Writers To Temper The Self-destructive Act Of Writing With Other Self-destructive Acts. I Certainly Was One Of Those People For A Long Time.

At This Point In My Life, I Find Myself Obsessed With Alternate Paths I Could've Taken. I Don't Think About This With A Sense Of Regret, But With A Sense Of Wonder.

Between Every Record, We All Split Off In Our Own World And We All End Up Listening To Usually Pretty Different Music On Our Own. We Come Together Not Really Knowing What The Other People Having Been Really Listening To And What's Been Influencing Them.