If You Go Down As A Comedian's

It's My Manifest Destiny To Wear A Skirt In All Countries.

Cake And Tea Or Death?

We Stole Countries With The Cunning Use Of Flags. Just Sail Around The World And Stick A Flag In. "i Claim India For Britain!" They're Going "you Can't Claim Us, We Live Here! Five Hundred Million Of Us!" "do You Have A Flag …? "no..." "well, If You Don't Have A Flag, Then You Can't Have A Country. Those Are The Rules... That I Just Made Up!

So In Europe, We Had Empires. Everyone Had Them - France And Spain And Britain And Turkey! The Ottoman Empire, Full Of Furniture For Some Reason. And The Austro-hungarian Empire, Famous For F-k All! Yes, All They Did Was Slowly Collapse Like A Flan In A Cupboard.

I've Wiped The File? .... I've Wiped All The Files? .... I've Wiped The Internet? I Don't Even Have A Modem!