I Live My Life Like There's No

I'm Focused On Staying As Healthy As I Can So I Can Work More.

If You Use Tact You Can Say Anything, Then Make It Funny.

Time Machine... Wouldn't You Like To Travel Through Time? I Would. I'd Go Back... Mess With People. You Know What I Would Do? I Would Go Back To When My Mom And Dad Were Having Sex, To Have Me. Ya'know, Come In, Spank My Dad On The Ass I'm Your Son From The Future! Ahaha!

Strip Clubs Are Great Places To Meet Interesting People You Only Wanna Know For About 40 Minutes.

I Once Overheard The Sweetest Old Woman Behind Me On A Train Tell Her Adorable Old Husband As He Scoffed Down A Ham Sandwich She Had Brought Along, "if You Ever Yell At Me To "stop Bringing A Ham Sandwich With Me Every Where We Go" Again? Next Time I'm Bringing A Gun. And I'm Blowing Your God Damn Head Off."