I Like My Women To Be Feminine,

Beckham? His Wife Can't Sing And His Barber Can't Cut Hair.

You Don't Want Roast Beef And Yorkshire Every Night And Twice On Sunday.

They Say Rome Wasn't Built In A Day, But I Wasn't On That Particular Job.

Bill Eventually Became Mr Tottenham Hotspur, And Produced Such A Dazzling Team At White Hart Lane That They Won The Double And Played The Game In A Way That Was An Object Lesson To Everybody.

Being Thick Isn't An Affliction If You're A Footballer, Because Your Brains Need To Be In Your Feet. And Beckham Works Hard, He's Brave And He Crosses A Ball Superbly. He Treats A Football Like He Does A Wife, Lovingly, With Caresses.