I Don't Have Credibility, I'm A Comedian.

In View Of All The Deadly Computer Viruses That Have Been Spreading Lately, Weekend Update Would Like To Remind You: When You Link Up To Another Computer, You're Linking Up To Every Computer That That Computer Has Ever Linked Up To.

There's Nothing Wrong With Being Shallow As Long As You're Insightful About It.

It's Nice To Be Included In The Broadcast Food Chain.

Michael Moore Simultaneously Represents Everything I Detest In A Human Being And Everything I Feel Obligated To Defend In An American. Quite Simply, It Is That Stupid Moron's Right To Be That Utterly, Completely Wrong.

A Recent Conversation: Dubya: Look At The Clock, Time Is Racing! Cheney: That's The Second Hand, George.