I Don't Do Drugs, Though. Just Weed.

Listen, Here It Is: Technically, I Never Quit. I'm Seven Years Late For Work.

My Wife Asked Me Once If I Weren't A Comedian, What I Would Do. I Couldn't Answer The Question. I Never Imagined Doing Anything Else.

You Know You Must Be Doing Something Right If Old People Like You.

Being Famous Is Great, It's Not Like Bad Or Horrible Or Anything.

The Hardest Thing To Do Is To Be True To Yourself, Especially When Everybody Is Watching.