I Can't Text. My Fingers Are Too

Crisis Doesn't Create Character; It Reveals It.

I'm Sick And Tired Of Our Generation Being Called The Tv Generation. What Do You Expect? We Watched Lee Harvey Oswald Get His Brains Blown Out All Over. How Could We Change The Channel After That?

People Are Disappointed That You Aren't Exactly Who They Thought You Were, As Opposed To Somebody Who's Just Walking Around Trying To Get Some Laundry Done.

Is It Possible To Get A Cup Of Coffee-flavored Coffee Anymore In This Country? What Happened With Coffee? Did I Miss A Meeting? They Have Every Other Flavor But Coffee-flavored Coffee. They Have Mochaccino, Frappaccino, Cappuccino, Al Pacino...coffee Doesn't Need A Menu, It Needs A Cup.

"yeah, Well, If You Eat Red Meat, It Stays In Your Colon For Fifteen Years!" Good! I Paid For It; I Want It In My Ass, Okay? I Want Them To Find A Meat Sweater From My Esophagus To My Asshole When They Open Me Up In The End! "this Guy's Covered In Meat! He's Meat-man! He's Meat-tracheotomy-man!"