For The Record, I Am Not A

Remind People That Profit Is The Difference Between Revenue And Expense. This Makes You Look Smart.

Nothing Defines Humans Better Than Their Willingness To Do Irrational Things In The Pursuit Of Phenomenally Unlikely Payoffs. This Is The Principle Behind Lotteries, Dating, And Religion.

The Human Mind Is A Delusion Generator, Not A Window To Trurh.

If You Haven't Already Told Your Kids 'don't Fellate The President' Then You're Probably A Bad Parent.

The Amount Of Energy Spent Laughing At A Joke Should Be Directly Proportional To The Hierarchical Status Of The Joke Teller.